This color is coming up as like a point of 'enjoyment' for you. An enjoyment in not being anything. In not wanting or trying to be anything. It's a very simple enjoyment. A simple enjoyment in there simply not being anything occupying your mind. In things being more 'silent'. There's no thoughts there to define you. Nothing 'dramatic' happening. There's just nothing happening really. It's just pure, genuine simplicity.

Things are extremely, extremely simple. And there is a thorough enjoyment in that. In fact, that's what enjoyment seems to actually come down to. For things to be taken to the simplest point, and letting go of any thoughts, reactions, experiences, definitions. In not wanting or being anything 'more'. When you just being is enough.

It's like the experience that's there in childhood. Where things are so simple, and there is nothing going on, that at the same time it feels like the whole world is open to you. You could go anywhere, do anything, be anything. Everything is a potential and an opportunity. Simply because you aren't yet defined by anything. You could just be sitting doing nothing and it would still feel like at the same time you are doing and accessing everything. Cause everything you need is right here.

It's also the simplistic point of being easily satisfied and happy. Being happy and content with just anything. Having no 'demands'. More like just being open to whatever comes your way. It's a 'going with the flow' in a sense and a complete freedom in whatever course your life may take.

It's like a new morning. Like starting afresh. But there is also a sense of 'caution' to this color. Saying to 'watch out!' for something. To be careful, to not make something of it. Careful of the definitions. Cause that'll be the death of this color/expression. To remain within and as simplicity. Remain in and as breath. The mind is a 'treacherous' place full of definitions ready to take away the simplicity and turn it into 'something'. So, just something to watch out for. And in the meantime, just enjoy yourself :) 

This is such a lovely color. And it came up in such a lovely way within you too. It's just like pure unfiltered loveliness lol. And it's interesting because it is actually not a color/expression that seems part of your 'design' so to speak. It doesn't seem to be part of 'Kristina'. So it's a bit of a 'surprise' color. Even something that you hide in a way. Because it is so 'not you'.

But it's also not an 'energy' or 'feeling' or personality design. It is an actual living 'loveliness'. That's why, as a personality design, it's not 'you', like when you'd think of the word 'loveliness' and the associations that would come up, but you are actually living it. 

It is more within how you look at the world, which is in a sort of 'letting things be' kind of way. In just not having any demands of the other person. As in not expecting them to fulfill something in you, but being quite accepting of another as they are. Which really allows for people to be able to relax and feel safe and cared for, rather than pressured or judged in any way. They know it's Ok for them to be themselves, and that in fact their expression is honored and appreciated.

That is real loveliness. It's not an act, a feeling or a personality expression. It's a real 'who you are', and that is very cool. In a way something only you can know or see about yourself, like a principle that you live by. And perhaps therefore also something you should recognize and appreciate more about yourself. To appreciate and embrace your loveliness as 'who you really are' inside. And realize that 'I, Kristina, am lovely' lol.

It's a new expression for and of you to just embrace really, since you've already been living it. And maybe also have a look at why you have resistance to embracing it as you. What's the memories there that have created a sort of aversion to 'living loveliness'? Or, what's the idea of loveliness that you've created in your mind? 

Cause this true loveliness is really quite an awesome quality that should be honored and cherished. And if you could only recognize and see it, you'd be able to also experience its awesomeness. I mean it's actually got your signature all over it lol, if you look beneath the surface. But so well hidden. The 'secret you'. But why you'd want to keep it a secret beats me. Like it's some really bad thing lol. It's actually just so sweet.

I mean but at the same time I suppose it's a good thing that it's 'hidden', cause that is one way to make sure it doesn't become a self-definition, but that it's rather something you're just cultivating in and as you. So the way that you are living this color/expression is basically in a way that's 'unorthodox'. Not your typical expression of 'loveliness'. But much more real at the same time.

This color is a sort of 'nothingness', but more a mental/emotional sort of 'nothingness'. As like a coping or suppression mechanism. It's a nothingness to hide into from the world. Like a forgetting that you exist, as a point of comfort. And to you it's like an 'alluring' experience. To in a way 'feel nothing' and 'think nothing' and to 'not even exist'. There is a sense of calm and peace about it.

It's like sitting in a bubble, feeling safe and sound, where you can just sit eternally in silence. It's this space in your head wherein you can sort of make everything quiet through suppressing everything in your mind, and for a few moments you can experience that sense of 'nothingness'. And in a way this color seems kind of 'innocent'. Cause, it's not like you're doing anything 'wrong'. You're not 'doing' anything at all in fact. It's just a small 'innocent' point of comfort.

But I mean this energy isn't the real you. It's not real nothingness or silence. So going into this energy state is kind of like making a choice to not be the real you. To rather choose the illusion of nothingness and silence in and of the mind. It's in those kind of moments that you kind of choose 'who you are', and where you 'fall' for the false comfort that the mind offers.

Where its actually in those moments that you should 'push through' and say 'no, I choose life! This is not me!' As the mind comes in with this programming to nicely suppress ALL OF YOU and so keep you from in fact pushing forward and truly change.

Going into this experience is certainly tempting. To just be able to experience that moment's peace and silence. To for a moment just 'not exist'. But yeah it's to just see and realize the illusion of it. That basically it's just another one of the mind's 'clever' sabotage schemes to make sure you stay away from real change.

So anytime you see yourself going into this experience, a 'solution' to apply in that moment would be rather look at which point you were actually busy moving in, and where you were actually close to a 'breakthrough'. Cause that's when the mind is going to go and pull out all the stops. And bring up these kind of experiences that seem 'innocent' and so alluring in their apparent innocence, yet are going to in a way almost undo the efforts you've been making to change a particular point.

And with the mind bringing up its own version of 'nothingness' and 'silence' it's actually showing that you were on your way to REAL nothingness and silence. It's just trying to fool you with a 'ready-made', 'fast-food' version of it, so you wouldn't go and create it yourself. Cause real nothingness and silence is NOTHING like this experience of it. This experience is very much just a suppression wherein there exists no life, no real 'you'. While real nothingness and silence is actually very ALIVE at the same time. Whereas this color/expression more carries that 'dead' signature of the mind. Where yes things are quiet, but you can sense that it's suppression or rather that it's an 'experience'. And experiences are always deceptive.