So this point is buried deep beneath the sea so to speak. Somewhere in a chest on the sea-floor where nobody will ever find it. Because you believe that's where it should remain and exist. It's sort of the 'reality of you when it comes to sex'. A reality you've always found 'unpleasant'. One you've never been able to accept. I mean it's even beyond 'not accepting'. It's a chastising, a stigmatizing, a denying, a downright absolute and resolute separation from this 'thing' that you perceive is your sexuality. As if it's this monster, a monstrosity, guilty of a horrible crime, to be locked away forever and for good and never to be seen or heard of again.

As if this one thing, this one expression, is the sole culprit and deviant and criminal that's messed everything up and now you have to remedy and mend everything by, as afore mentioned, locking it away and throwing away the key. This is not a way of living, however! It's the way of your living though. You've lived this way. So firmly believing in this 'self-chastising' as a way of life. 

You're amazing. You're wonderful. But it's something you interestingly enough don't accept. It's something that needs to be pointed out to you. That there's nothing wrong with you lol. That you're quite alright and there's really no reason for you to suppress yourself at all. So this color is showing this weird attitude and relationship you have with yourself, wherein you're adamant that there must be something wrong with you, and you don't wish to see yourself as just 'good', as 'normal' and 'fine'. It's like it's just so hard to wrap your head around there not being anything about you for you to judge or beat yourself up about. In your mind you're like 'THERE MUST BE SOMETHING', so it's hard for you to 'accept yourself' because of this belief.

So really you just need to find a way to accept yourself. To especially accept those parts/aspects/expressions of you that tend to seem 'wrong' to you, and to reject the idea that there's really anything at all about you that needs to be shunned or in any way treated or be seen in a bad/negative light. There must be no judgments existent within you. No 'feeling bad' about yourself too. Only honoring yourself. Only seeing 'good' in yourself so to speak, and being gentle with yourself. And 'lick your wounds'. Wipe away any assumptions you've ever had that you're in any way wrong, forgiving yourself for ever having had such harmful thoughts towards yourself.

So this color is showing you your paranoia, or the sort of 'core paranoia' that sits in your mind, in terms of the belief in you being wrong. And yes, it seems to be related to sex with you. Like sex is somehow this thing where you believe you've done a lot wrong. Something that'll haunt you forever. But really, again, it's that you haven't forgiven yourself.

But it's strange because you also don't want me to talk about any of this. This color is very much saying, "this is my secret and my secret is sacred and you shall not cross this line behind which my secret exists". So I can only read very select dimensions of this color as much of it reads "restricted". And also in a way saying, "if you want help, you have to open up", and "you can't expect anything if you're not willing to give(=open up)."  In a way giving is receiving with this color. The more you open up and give and let go and release the boundaries of the 'secret', the clearer the solution will become. Cause right now it's sort of an 'ego-point', as in something you don't really want to let go of, hence the 'secrecy'. You want answers but at the same time you don't want to be open about the question. So the ego is attempting to control the outcome. You cannot change a point that you keep hidden.

So what's the shame/guilt/judgments 'anchoring' this point within you, because you feel you cannot be open about it? The openness is also not in relation to me or anyone else, but yourself. You want to be able to look at the point without feeling any shame or have any judgments.